2. The challenge now is to move beyond whatever misunderstandings there have been and to reach the proper point of balance, especially by entering more deeply into the contemplative dimension of worship, which includes the sense of awe, reverence and adoration which are fundamental attitudes in our relationship with God. This will happen only if we recognize that the liturgy has dimensions both local anduniversal, time-bound and eternal, horizontal and vertical, subjective and objective. It is precisely these tensions which give to Catholic worship its distinctive character.

(Pope John Paul II, ad limina address to the bishops of Washington, Oregon, Idaho, Montana, and Alaska, 1998)

I’ve been a parishioner of Assumption Grotto in Detroit for just over 20 years. Prior to that, I wandered from parish to parish. I never knew what I was looking for until it was found. Even though I did not understand it all, deep down I knew my soul needed what was there. It was atypical as American parishes go, but apparently, God deemed that I needed what it offered. What made it atypical? It is probably not what you think. In what way did it help me spiritually? Extracting the answers from my own interior dialogue and onto a keyboard is a challenge because I continue to grow in my understanding. It’s like hitting a moving target. Trying to do so also invites being misunderstood, perhaps because finding the right words to explain deeply spiritual concepts is not easy, especially with no background in theology and philosophy.

In the past 20+ years, I’ve gone through various phases, from disorientation and wonder upon first discovering Assumption Grotto, to confusion and anger over the watered-down Catholicism of my youth that left me ill-equipped for the world; and remorse over the years I spent in lukewarmness of faith, prior to 2005. Then came a liberating phase that moved me beyond the anger and into deeper reflection and understanding – the fruit of which, was even more faith, hope, and charity. It is from more than 20 years of experience that I begin this series.

Expressing an interest in the writings of St. John of the Cross in an email back in 2005, as I thought about taking my faith more seriously, it was suggested to me by Mother Mary Elizabeth, OCD at the Monastery of St. Therese in Clinton Township, Michigan, that I should consider visiting a community of secular Carmelites. Those who belong to the Secular Order of Discalced Carmelites are full members of the order, but they live in the world. Lay people, as well as diocesan priests, can be members. With it comes promises and obligations. Assumption Grotto happened to be a base for one such community and Mother sensed it might be a good fit for me. The rest is history. I made my Definitive Promise on March 3, 2012, after six years of formation and continue to be a member of this thriving community.

I blogged for many years, mostly opining on current events in the Catholic Church. I was one voice contributing to a cacophony on these things on the web. After breaking for close to ten years, I finally realized that God used this activity for my own development and I needed to start writing again. I decided to start over, but with a new blog that has an emphasis on Catholic spirituality, with a Carmelite flavor. I need to probe deep inside of myself and look for ways to explain things I understand, even imperfectly at times, and for which I do not always have the words. The words come to me through prayer and reflection as graces flow according to God’s desires. Diving into Scripture, the saints, and Church documents, also helps me to find the words.

There are so many components that factor into this subject of contemplative worship in the Mass, I must split it up into parts. I might build-upon it in other posts after I complete the initial series. It’s going to grow with me. I don’t really have the answers; rather, I just have thoughts that I continue to ponder. So, if you want to follow this series, and other posts I make here, this is my shameless plug to add your email to the relevant field in the right sidebar.

In my next post in the series, I’ll discuss the various expressions of prayer. I can’t explain how I see contemplative worship in the Mass without providing a foundation first.

I don’t have time to moderate comments and they are off, so please share this post in social media. Perhaps I’ll run across some discussions, challenges, and other things to reflect on out there. I can’t say whether I will get engaged in any of these for the same reason comments are closed here.